15 多谓语并列的翻译点拨

本研究院成立于1968220,隶属中国航天科技集团公司。经过40年的发展,已成为中国主要的空间技术及产品研制基地,是中国空间事业最具实力的骨干力量。主要从事空间技术开发,航天器研制,空间领域对外技术交流和合作,航天技术应用等服务。还参与制定国家空间技术发展规划,研究有关探索开发利用外层空间的技术途径,承接用户需求的各类航天器和地面应用设备的研制业务并提供相应的服务。

After 40 years' development, we institute, oriented in February 20, 1968, have become the most promising behemoth in China space area conducting main research and development of space technology and product. Dedicated in the development of space technology and aircrafts, technical communication and cooperation in space, and application in space technology, we are in business of designing and manufacturing any kind of aircrafts and gound facility in custom demand and responding service, participating in setting up the development of national space technology to research technical means relating exploration, development and application of outer space.

请各位老师指点一下翻译的怎么样,有哪些不是光靠积累就能改变的技巧问题?

晚辈万分感谢!点滴之恩当涌泉相报!

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千千学堂 - 英语图书编辑
擅长:英语

The Institute, under the China Aerospace Science and Technology Corporation, was founded on February 20, 1968. After 40 years’ development, it has become China's main space technology and product development base, and the most powerful backbone force in China's space industry. It is mainly engaged in space technology development, spacecraft development, foreign technology exchanges and cooperation in the space field, and space technology applications. It also involves participating in the formulation of the national space technology development plan, doing researches on the exploration and utilization of outer space technology approaches, undertaking the development of various spacecraft and ground application equipment required by users and providing corresponding services.

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哈勃

同学你好,这是Catti三笔的考题吧。上面老师已经指出了一些你的译文中一些很低级的语法错误。如果这是经过你认真修改的译文,那么,我觉得你在一些语法点上可能有漏洞,在汉语切分和汉语理解上存在一定问题,需要花时间去补。翻译出的译文语法正确应当是前提,而语言的地道性才是翻译需要追求的,并不是自己生搬硬造出某种表达。

如文中的“the most promising behemoth“可能就欠缺地道性。


根据牛津高阶英汉双解词典:behemoth; something that is very big and powerful, especially a company or organization 超级公司(或机构)

本文中出现研究院用behemoth以描述其实稍欠合适,该研究院属于国家的研究机构,不应与普通公司混为一谈。我觉得题主过度关注使用一些高级的词汇或表达,反而在其使用出现一些错误。

再有就是文中的in business of,其实这也是错误用法。没有该表达,你可以认真查一下词典,而不是直接百度网络释义。

整篇译文来看,翻译质量并不好,低级语法错误多处,表达错误,语言逻辑欠缺,需要慢慢针对问题改进。

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雪夫

不是专业的翻译老师,但是你的汉语本身就不正确,句子划分不正常。

除了专有名词之外,我看到了几处基础错误:

1. 本研究院的翻译we institute最起码应该是our institute。主谓一致原则要求其谓语使用单数,因此,have become应该是has become。

2. dedicated后介词应该是to,不是in,表达“主要从事”还可以用specialize in。

3. 末句relating后少介词to。

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  • Michaelson 提出于 2021-05-19 00:58

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